Gleeked on

I would like to take a minute to explain how I got gleeked on today and why you should try to avoid all communications experts. (Just in case "Gleeking on wiki)

So this particular one, who is possibly the most technologically challenged person I know, comes springing into my cube this morning, chewing. She eats all the time, but never sitting down. I think that's the way she stays skinny -- she can eat anything, but she can only eat while moving -- hence the disgusting episode where she stood in the office across the hall sucking strawberries off the green stems producing revolting loud sloppy sucking noises. Also much like the time she ate dry granola out of a bowl with a spoon while she stood in the same doorway, flinging granola every which way.

This morning she was chewing/smacking furiously on whatever was left in her mouth, all the while talking to me about some papers she was furiously waving about. Her excited explanation was something related to the CEO and this Very Important Initiative. She's created a clever acronym for this initiative -- hang on to your hat, it is -- SOB. She even wanted to get an email for questions you could ask the CEO that started with SOB@work.com. (Ha ha ha!!!) I answered one of her technological questions when she took a break to breathe... at that millisecond a stream of saliva spurted out of her mouth, across the corner of my desk and on my keyboard tray. Before I even realized she quickly hopped all the way into my cube and wiped at me, my desk and the keyboard tray with her hands... only saying, "oh sorry about that" before continuing.

I wanted to puke.

My supervisor almost died laughing when I came into her office to complain.