Not much new...

Again with the lame inexplicable posting break. Only excuse: my life was boring this week.

Nothing new here.
Nothing to see.
Carry on.

Weebl and Bob and Pie

I believe that everyone should see the pie clip. You really must. I talk about it enough.

Home Star Runner

It's so much fun. http://www.homestarrunner.com/

Funny site

Overheard in passing...

Christmas Grinch

I decided not to give anyone else a Christmas present this year… instead all my friends and loved ones can help me out by saving my money for a down-payment for my condo. This would be the gift I wish for myself from them.

Blackcurrant Gummies

Lovely gummies found in the scary import section of Superstore: Gummy Blackcurrants.

I love gummies!!

Happy Windsday

Something else that strikes me as funny is people with hair when it's windy. People look funny when it's windy and their hair is all messed up or blowing straight back.

too funny to pass up

http://www.jonessoda.com/files/3-legged_mutt.mov

What will they think of next?

Jones Soda...

New for Thanksgiving -- Green Bean Casserole Soda, Mashed Potato & Butter Soda, Fruitcake Soda, Cranberry Soda and Turkey & Gravy Soda.

Check it out.

More than anything

More than anything on the web I love www.notmydesk.com. I guess that should be "more than anything I loved..." because now he's gone.

Good thing for the wayback machine.

If they didn't pay me

If they didn't pay me, I wouldn't go to work. (...if they paid me any less, I wouldn't go to work either.)

Happily, I've had as much to do in the first 10 days of November as September and October combined.

I say happily as I've been released from doing mundane look-busy-work which is more taxing on the brain. Only because it's harder to hide personal emailing behind look-busy-work than actual work.

It's all fun and games...

...until someone loses an eye.

Or $100,000.00.

Or their mind.

Looking for apartments this weekend was interesting. Poking through a stranger's house and looking at the pictures on their fridge, wondering why they removed the closet doors and put their bed into the closet.

Moving my blog -- easier to update will hopefully result in frequenter posts.

Dear Systems Administrator(s),

I have password rage, and I really can't be responsible for so many passwords in my condition. It's kind of like short-term memory loss, but really more like long-term obscure remembering ability and short-term forgetting ability. It's very rare and serious and usually happens when I meet new people or get a new password... I know it's all very confusing to you, but I'm serious. My backgammon game with my friend is just not really that much of a secret, so if we could just cut it out with the passwords I'd feel better about myself.

Also, since I'm making up rules, let's remember not to give single people stupid advice that starts out in a story of how they "caught" the lucky other person. It's different for every single human being on earth, what makes anyone think it'd be the same for someone else??

Let's remember as a rule when we're lucky enough to get married and have kids this one important thing: don't tell non-pregnant, non-kid-having people stuff they don't care about and can't relate to.

It's boring blah blah blah. Or a horror story that will turn us off for sure.

I'm reading a book about finding the love of your life. It's silly and I am enjoying it immensely. It's the kind of drivel you'd expect and it's completely moronic and yet totally common sense advice. The first chapter deals with eliminating the seven most prevalent causes of faulty mate selection. It was pedestrian, so I'll spare you.

In the second chapter, it recommended forming a mental image of your future spouse. One of the points to consider is intelligence. "No one wants to marry someone well below them in intelligence. But you may not want to marry a genius either. Sometimes, a potential mate is too intelligent. Or maybe he is smart in ways that make him a bad match for you. What kind of intelligence do you want your future mate to have?"

Another point is appearance. "While it would be foolish to base your decision too heavily on appearance, your individual tastes should be considered when formulating the image of your perfect person. You must settle on your own preferences... Determine a look you will be pleased with."

Other points to consider were ambition, chemistry, spirituality, character, creativity authenticity, and others, all discussed in nauseating detail.

The kicker was that to start off this lame chapter the author wrote:
"So my challenge to you is to become all that you are capable of becoming. At the same time I encourage you to look squarely at yourself and appraise your overall attractiveness accurately. But remember this: It's probably best to search for someone who seems to be a little above you -- and then to try with all you have to become the person who will be attractive to that individual."

In a nutshell the deal to getting yourself mated up is -- find someone you're attracted to, find out what kinds of people they're attracted to, (as far as appearance and personality) then become the person that they would be attracted to, forgoing your own personality and changing your appearance to be as little like yourself as possible, thereby basing your entire relationship on fraudulent evidence of yourself.

Library Romance -- I want to make up a story and submit it, tee hee!

Actually... reflecting upon it, I'm sad that working in libraries nothing like that has happened to me. Sort of. Well, it's not like I work in a traditional library or with regular library patrons. Good thing too, since some homeless people that hang out in regular libraries all day. And it's kind of embarrassing to be flirting with the library patrons in my job, since it's the same 150 people that are in the company and I'd have to see them all the time. (Not that it's stopped me...)

Things I think you should not do

You should not name a baby girl Berry. Or worse yet, Berri.

Or a boy Leslie or Ashley. I just think you shouldn't.

The Office

I watched the second season of The Office, the BBC comedy that everyone is talking about. I had so much anxiety about the situation that I nearly had to turn it off.

It hits too close to home.

I didn't want to know

To start off this update, some information about me: I'm usually a bear in the morning -- but I'm fairly civil unless spoken to. I generally don't like people on busses or at bus stops, although they usually give me ample material to laugh and write about.

Today I get out to my bus stop and the one guy I actually don't mind saying "good morning" to is already standing there. Usually we say "good morning" to each other and then he gives me a brief weather report. He is a Newfie and fixated on weather reports. I'm not sure where he gets these weather reports because they all contain forecasts of rain. I am pretty sure he doesn't like sun and suffers from bad-news-glee. That concludes our limited conversation and I can go back to sleeping with my eyes open, standing up, waiting for the bus.

Anyhow, today I said to him: "Good morning."
He pokes his finger into his nose and says "I've got a pimple right under my nose, and it's driving me nuts!!"

Found two quarters today!

I always figured I had a gift for finding dimes... everywhere I go I normally find dimes. I guess they're kind of thin and they are the smallest of change so they could easily fall out of people's pockets. But then discussing superstitions at lunch one day someone said "see a penny, pick it up, then all day you'll have good luck. Oh but never pick up a dime if you find it on the street." And instead of saying why, everyone agreed and nodded and continued the conversation. I interrupted and wanted to know why but no one would tell me.

You know what? That's fine. Don't tell me and I'll continue to pick up everyone's dimes everywhere I go. I'm raking in the dough, 10 cents at a time!

Bus fun

Another day on the bus, more people that smell like urine.

And a funny poem on the morning bus. See it here.

Choir practice is not cancelled

I've been so excited because choir practice was cancelled this week... I told everyone I know.

Then I got an email: "There seems to be some confusion about whether or not there is practice this Tuesday (July 6) - as I mentioned at last week's practice, there will be a practice this week. I would really appreciate it if you could make it."

Poop.

Found: One American Quarter

As I was picking up my friend to take her to the airport early this morning. And that's like a buck seventy-five Canadian! Woot!

The Yeti Chair

I stumbled in to work this morning, still half bemused by sleep and lack of caffeine, to find a long (really long), thick (really thick), black hair (really ugly) sitting in front of my monitor. Immediately I controlled the retch impulse and fought back rising panic while I tried to get the hair off my stuff and into the trash.

After I had disposed of it I had a flashback to my first day of work.

It happened like this: I was introduced to coworkers and shown to my cubicle. Only to find the Yeti had been turned into a chair and banished to Edmonton, Alberta, living my cube. Removing the hair required a pair of scissors and a certain amount of company time. It was like shearing a sheep -- every couple of days I'd have to do it again because it seemed to grow out of the stuffing.

Stinky bus people (still bug me)

There's an awful person on the morning bus of a certain ethnicity who seems to have stomach problems. I say -- "it seems" and "awful" only because I'm fairly certain that the occasional smells of putrid gasses seem to emanate from this one person, quite awfully so. By "occasional" I mean regularly frequently, maybe every two minutes or so.

Today this person sat directly behind me and not only proceeded to emit gasses but eat carrots and chew with an open mouth for the entire ride.

I know!!

I mean, really! Carrots for breakfast?? What was this person thinking!?

Not to be too girly or anything, but I bought a lipstick. Never have worn lipstick before. It's not pink and it's quite dramatic.

I happened to have scratched myself under the eye while sleeping. I look like I punched myself in the face. Luckily my hair looks ok.

The average person loses between 100 and 200 hairs from their head every day. And I have started worrying about this.

I gave up my library card a long, long time ago, partially because it disgusted me to be reading a book and to find someone else's hair in the book. Especially if it was a stupid book. The other reasons I gave up my card had something to do with my inability to return books on time and my unwillingness to read a bestseller after 34 people ahead of me on the waiting list had all read it. By the time I get books from the library, someone usually has smeared chocolate cake into the margins, slobbered all over the corners while flipping pages, and dropped it in the bath. (Ok, ok, so I have more issues than just hair... but nobody should ever lick their finger to turn a page. Ever. Especially not with a book for public use.)

Anyhow, back to my hair phobia. Recently, on the bus, a woman with long dark hair sat down in front of me. I noted that she had filthy, greasy, dirty hair. I further noted that one single hair was hanging out a little bit further than the rest... and for the next five minutes I was mesmerized watching this hair grow longer and longer until finally, with a sudden lurch of the bus, it was deposited into my lap. I had to fight an instant gag reflex.

Today, again on the bus, I had my eyes closed and one strand of someone's hair flew into my face. I think the lady next to me thought I was crazy --flapping and waving my arms around and pulling at my nose -- going "pffft! bbbbbffffffffft!! pfffftt!"

The saddest part about still being single and all your good friends marrying is the fact that your secrets will no longer be, well... secret. No matter how intensely private you think a matter is it will eventually come out of your best friend's husband's mouth most likely in an inopportune moment, and invariably in a public place.

Ich bin ein Berliner!

Speaking of identifying persons of ethnicity, today at the bus stop there was a man who was German. Without a doubt.

How, do you ask, do I know he was German? Was it the German-style haircut -- short on the bottom and longer over the thinning top? Was it the funny German-style pull-over-the-head pullover with the stand-up collar? Was it the cream coloured brand-new Levi Red Tab jeans? Was it the fact that his face was so angular that not only his nose came to a point, but his jawbone came to a point and his chin came to even more of a point? His ice-cold light blue eyes? The way he could sleep anywhere, even on a hot, bumpy, smelly bus? The way he wore his backpack?

Anyone of those things may have tipped me off, however all combined it was like wearing a flag, "Jawohl, Ich bin ein German!"

If I see him tomorrow I'll confirm it.

To my faithful reader: Thanks for checking. Feel free to give me that virtual kick in the pants every once in a while.

Tomorrow is the longest day of the year. Somehow with my knees knocking together out at the bus stop in the mornings I don't feel very summery.

On my way back to lunch today, I was lost in a sea of short Japanese tourists in our lobby. What, do you ask, were they doing there? I am not sure. They may have been lost.

How, do you ask, do you know they were Japanese tourists?

floppy hats -- check
funny short pants -- check
white plastic runners -- check
cameras & video equipment -- check, check
grandmother in tow -- check
big white tour bus with tinted windows dropping them off -- dead give away.

Also, they were absolutely in the way of everyone who belonged in the building.

Allergies. The stuff I take for them is putting me to sleep, the coffee I drink to keep me awake at work is making my stomach upset, and I can't seem to focus on my computer screen.

I may be going blind.

Typing School

I had to type up a table of contents for an Indian tobacco journal for work -- I believe that is what they should use for teaching people how to type. Forget all that lazy brown dog stuff and Mary and the seashore. If it wasn't plant related latin words for nematodes, or some-such, then it was the author names, five or six people for each article. Most of them had 15 letters and repeated similar combinations. My spell checker went nuts! Who knows if I actually got it right.

Character Reference

Complete the following sentences. For added fun have the person you're doing the character reference for sitting in front of you.

The applicants' character can be described as _________ .
The applicants' reputation can only be described as __________.

Very depressing thought courtesy of a great friend:

"what are the odds that someone cute is also very smart?"

Offices are usually full of strange and wonderful people. We have one guy that was demoted from an office into a cubicle and as a silent protest he refuses to make the cubicle his home. There is not one thing in his cube (when he is not in it) to make it look occupied. When he is in his cube he hangs his coat on a hanger, and then the hanger on a coat stand, and the coat stand is moved directly in the entrance of his cube so no one can tell what exactly is going on in there.

Except I can hear him whining. About not having an office.

Character

It's surprising what we put up with when we know what a person is all about. Selfishness, arrogance, stupidity, smells -- these all may not pose problems if we understand a persons basic character.

I, however, have nothing leftover for boring people.

The woman who had my job before me died alone in her apartment. I think there might have been a pet. After a week of trying to get a hold of her they gave up and contacted family. There was an autopsy but the body was in bad shape after all that time and they couldn't determine the cause or time of death.

I've tried not to dwell on that fact. I'm also trying to remember that all the junk in my cubicle at work is stuff she probably planned to work on and didn't get to.

Dear Punctuation Abusers:

I want to put you in Punctuation Jail for misusing punctuation so very liberally. Why do you do it??!? It's so hard to read when every other sentence ends in either two or three exclamation points or question marks!!! And the others trail off in a flurry of ellipses... Darn you for annoying me...

If I could be any girl in the whole entire world I'd be Julia Stiles. With Heath Ledger as my boyfriend. If my life could be 10 Things I Hate About You.

Can't lose the adventure in my life. Can't!!

Complaining about my boring purse today, I realized I have a fashion purse phobia, and that's why I stick to boring purses. It's true. My phobia started a couple of years ago when interesting shaped purses were all the rage and I found this super cute little purse with a double zipper --and wound up receiving quite a few compliments of the ingenuity of using a pencil case as a purse from a few admiring teenagers. GA!

Overheard in the cube farm today -- two guys, prairie dogging over the wall...

"so... what does she look like?"
"She's attractive."
"Blonde?"

...yes, because only blondes are attractive. You really do hear the strangest things in open areas...

Reason not to get MSN:

** says:hi there, how are you doing?

pinklemonade says:good how are
you?

** says:good thank's

** says:how was you're trip to Germany?

Name withheld to protect the innocent.

I love Hugh Grant. I am absolutely convinced that he will realize that I am alive and come find me and ask me to marry him. We would live happily ever after.

I also love Hugh Jackman, Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy and the guy who played Tad Hamilton in the movie and Pierce Brosnan, even though he is old.

Crazily, I missed the bus today. But I told some other woman that my bus would take her where she wanted to go. I was so confused by talking bus numbers, I forgot which bus I was waiting for and forgot to get on myself.

Starbucks sent me a gift certificate to help me deal with my pain and suffering from my burn... a gift card for ten whole dollars. That's right, $10.

Wow. That's so cheap I almost want to change my mind and stick it to them.

Some website I was reading on synchronicity and seriality mentioned the word incouciant... which is a word I just discovered and has been making the rounds in about every book I've read in the past weeks, which strangely enough is totally about seriality...

"For instance, someone rolls off a particularly mellifluous sounding word in conversation, "insouciant," that piques your curiosity but you have no idea of its meaning. Shortly after hearing it the first time, you read it in a book, someone else uses it in conversation-and someone else. This clustering of the word "insouciant" is an example of Kammerer's notion of seriality, and for Kammerer, much to his critic's disagreement, this patterning was not random but meaningful."

So I had to look up mellifluous too... which means:

1. Flowing with sweetness or honey.
2. Smooth and sweet: “polite and cordial, with a mellifluous, well-educated voice”

Funny -- I go into Chapters with a stomach ache and a touch of the flu and walk out healed. Is it the magical paper dust? Is it the enchanted ink smell?

Courtesy of my best friend:

"I don't really care how time is reckoned so long as there is some agreement about it, but I object to being told that I am saving daylight when my reason tells me that I am doing nothing of the kind. I even object to the implication that I am wasting something valuable if I stay in bed after the sun has risen. As an admirer of moonlight I resent the bossy insistence of those who want to reduce my time for enjoying it. At the back of the Daylight Saving scheme I detect the bony, blue-fingered hand of Puritanism, eager to push people into bed earlier, and get them up earlier, to make them healthy, wealthy and wise in spite of themselves."

(Robertson Davies, The Diary of Samuel Marchbanks, 1947, XIX, Sunday.)

Girls need girlfriends. I'm so glad I have some!

Lost of love... that's kind of hard to say of anybody. Almost everybody has somebody to love them, don't they?

I still think I'll end up writing a book at some point. I just have too much to say.

I stopped to talk to a homeless person last week who had a small brass statue of an elephant on his tray where he was collecting coins from passersby. I asked him what the elephant was for and he shrugged, but when I turned to walk away he called me back and very seriously asked me if I could please get everyone to stop killing the elephants.

Here is my attempt to get the word out: Hey everybody, please stop killing the Elephants!

Thanks.

There was a work meltdown today due to a banana.

"Someone" was a little sensitive about sad looking bananas in a manual that was supposed to be printed....

We think "someone" might have a little problem!

I have a strange sense of schadenfreude to realize that my horrible job from before Christmas only has three original employees left. (excluding the manager and two owners) The management has behaved so poorly that two former colleagues and three non-english programmers saw the light and have quit in the two months since I've quit.

You should know about my penchant for mediocre speakers, there is always so much more food for thought in poor speakers than good ones.

I would have thought it impossible, but my brother's car odometer is 10 km/h slower than my car's odometer. He thinks I'm speeding... and that I'm looking for an excuse.

I got 2nd degree burns today, from a Starbucks incident involving coffee from their cheap coffee thermoses. That's right, the coffee which usually isn't hot enough to drink, burned my arm. And to make matters worse the burn is in an interesting imprint of my ribbed sweater. It includes pussy blisters.

i noticed recently that my eyebrows aren't the same shape. weird.

my brother and sister and I have had a sad week of eating pizza and toast for suppers.

Good idea from a friend: have an un-shower party (for the too-picky carreer girls like us?!)

Yes, I could show off all of my stuff! "Here is where I keep the mismatched set of yellow and orange towels my mom got for her wedding from Aunt So-and-so that she never liked and never used, and over here I keep my stylish 70s tupperware sets, all discards from a sympathetic female relative! Have a seat in my mismatched chairs and sofa.

Please have pity on me and leave money in the fruit bowl on the counter on your way out..."

I got to my computer training this morning and I was puzzled to find the address was a townhouse. I couldn't believe it, but I went up and knocked anyhow and this older lady opened the door and let me into her living room where I sat next to a huge bird cage with a squaking bird in it. There were three of us at the "training" and two of us sat at her dining room table and one of us sat at a small lap sized table, and she sat in her rocking chair behind us. She made coffee in this old coffee perk that went on top of the stove and there was this glass knob on it... the whole day and the entire house and it's owner -- it was all so odd. Her kitchen table (where we sat for break time) had computer manuals and discarded library books from mid-80s and 90s about microprocessors and other stuff lined up against the wall. The bird, the rocking chair and the early 70s carpet and wallpaper... it was all really weird.

I got to go to an AA meeting last night. Work related, of course... cough cough.

Have you ever been to a wedding that had so many things go wrong or flakey or be so ugly or disorganized that you just sat there going "wow, I'm glad this wasn't my wedding!"

Let's just say after almost three hours of speeches, no one wanted to be there anymore, except for possibly the bride and groom.

I like ethnic food.
I like to eat, period.
If that's not possible, there's nothing better than a good food conversation.

Family Day. Went shopping with my dear brother and realized how very different our tastes are. I would wear something black sliver stripes, sequins, sparkles or other flashy attention getting device. He would not.

We're very judgemental about each other's tastes.

I am absolutely loving Find Me in the River by Delerious. Over and over and over again.

The stupid line up for the microwave was 15 minutes long today. Maybe there is something to be said for the good old PB&J standby.

Today someone had left a red shiny bulldog clip for papers on the table in the lunchroom, with no papers in it. Clearly it was abandoned. I felt sorry for the poor, red, shiny, beautiful clip that no one wanted... so I picked it up and put it on some of my papers. It looked so nice and happy at the top of my meeting minutes.

I probably have a magpie in me somewhere...

There's this lady that stands at the same bus stop as I do after work. She clearly has more issues than I do as she stands there until her bus comes calling out other people's bus numbers. "Who wants the 79??" "And here comes the 8!!" "Anyone for the 401?"

The 401 didn't leave right away as it was picking up an inordinate amount of people. She finally decided that it had stood at the stop long enough and tried shooing it. "Go on, scat! Get out of here!"

Today's discovery: Toothpaste has an expiry date.

That's right... toothpaste. After a certain amount of time you will not be freshening your breath anymore.

Advertisement outside of a tanning salon today:

"Come warm your
heart & soul.
Phone #"

Heart & SOUL?? You're a freakin' cancer disbersment centre, not a spiritual retreat!!

I am a dangerous sleep deprived crabby PMS person with email.

So scary.

Just to prove that sometimes I am really slow, I finally understood this other advertisement that I've seen since November on bus shelters, etc. It says in capital letters, over top a picture of birkenstocks:
FLIP FLOP
SEASONS OVER
NATURE BOY

I wondered for a month or two what kind of pathetic haiku that was. Just now it occured to me that if you were to write it in mixed lowercase and added some punctuation it would make sense this way "Flip-flop season's over, Nature Boy." (i'm not sure about the apostrophe.) Ok, an ad that takes me a couple of months to figure out is not an effective ad.

The worst thing about all your friends marrying at the same time is when the all end up having kids at the same time. Three years ago it was all about the weddings, this year it's all about the kids. Three of my friends are pregnant -- two are due in the next month and one early in June. My cousin too, and a girl who is younger than me at our church. Two girls I can think of right now have had a baby less than a year ago. Ack...

I looked at couches at two places and can't decide if I am the "funky & unusual (and of undetermined quality) and no matching loveseat or chairs" couch that doesn't have any side arms but I could pair it with a leather bench and random cool chairs, or if I am the "detail oriented, good quality, super comfy couch with matching loveseat and lazy-boy chair that doesn't look like a lazy-boy" kind of person.

Clearly, I have issues.

Corner Gas. The funniest Canadian sitcom ever. You should watch.

Favorite joke to play on new people I meet (after I beat "How do you solve a problem like Maria" out of their heads) is to bring up the topic of last names and make an offhand remark about difficult names. All kinds of names come up and then eventually someone asks what mine is and I say "Oh, lots of people have difficulties with mine... it's German." And they're like "uh huh, and... are you going to tell us what it is?" Hahaha!!Right. Small things amuse small minds.

Today I contemplated a career in express line security. Honestly, the woman in the line up ahead of me didn't just have more than 15 items, she had enough food to cook a pot of soup for the homeless -- but it was skinny crazy diet woman food so I bet she wasn't cooking for the homeless. She was just being a rude line-up person.

I'd make a good express line checker. "I'm sorry ma'am, you'll have to take your purchases to another till. See here this bag of mushrooms? Yeah, uh huh, there are at least ten in this bag plus your box of eight granola bars... that's eighteen items, please be considerate of other shoppers next time!

I met someone strange. He had this odd way of being really close in my personal space and every time I took a step back I wouldn't notice how, but he kept inching closer and closer. I was trying to figure out when he'd take a step closer or how he managed to move in to my space -- but it wasn't apparent, but it was almost disconcerting. Only "almost" because he was nice, didn't have bad breath or anything, but he was a little intense and had a funny smile that made me think he was a little crazy -- like fanatical about church kind of crazy. The Fantastical Joy of The Lord smile.

Oh, and that idea about keeping one foot extended a bit and leaning back so that the person doesn't infringe on your space because your foot is in it? Fallacy. It doesn't work.

Work is fun. (I'm so tired I can't think to write.)

Watched my shows, thought about what I will be missing next week when at work. Watched some more daytime tv, thought about moving off the couch. Decided against movement, watched more shows instead. Ate some lunch, watched some more shows. Flicked around and, surprisingly, found more shows to watch and didn't move until dinner. It's a hard life, but somebody's gotta do it.

Met KA for supper and realized that we're getting older. Third person to bug me about writing a book in a week. Saw a book at Chapters called Fat Girls and Lawn Chairs, or maybe it was Fat Girls in Lawn Chairs or something like that. Intriguing title. Had some interesting spam in my inbox today that also had great subject lines. Emailed with my BF today and had a discussion of interesting subject lines. Should think of something catchy for a title of a book that I will write. Thought about the concept: a title sells a book, who cares what's in it or what it's about.

Accepted job offer and so must put on hold the plans for homelessness. It's a shame because I would have been good at it. In my opinion the no.1 thing to remember when panhandling: be specifc, no one turns you down if you ask for a dollar, but they will if you ask for spare change.

Will have to postpone my idea to become a homeless person for a bit. I have a job interview on Monday.

Had a crabby morning trying to figure out how to ftp to a shaw account. I can get connected from the computer upstairs and transfer files, but not from my own computer and superior brand of internet connection.

Decided I should start wearing name tag "Hello, My Name is Maria. I am still a jobless bum."

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