bump removal program

On the bus, at conferences, at work, I have been noticing more and more people have ugly bumps.

No, I'm not talking about the odd lumpy shapes people are in, but their moles.

No, I'm not talking about nice little beauty marks, I'm talking about scary-looking, bumps-on-top-bumps, odd-shaped, wrinkled-and-deformed, definitely-cancer-hiding BUMPS.

We need to start a bump removal program.

BJ & Shannon

Last year I started listening to country music full-time. Only because the radio station I liked had changed to a country music format. I tried to find a new station to listen to but I could not -- the morning radio show hosts on the other stations had inside jokes I did not understand, they were unfamiliar, they just did not feel right and so I started listening to country music exclusively in the mornings. A few weeks ago now, both hosts left and again I feel lost in the mornings. These new hosts also do not feel right, they also have jokes I do not understand, and are unfamiliar to me. I miss my old familiar morning radio friends.

Fueled by Chocolate

Tante Maria always tells me that in Russia the students at elite schools were given chocolate in order to fuel creativity and thinking.

It seems to be working in my course too. It's been powered almost exclusively by Moritz Icy Squares, with excellent results.

In My Next Life...

In this life I'm a woman. In my next life I'd like to come back as a bear.

When you're a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute cuddly cubs.
I could definitely deal with that.

If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that.

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling.
He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup... gonna be a bear.

Rain, rain, go away!

It's been pouring cats and dogs all week, and I've been miserably sick the entire week. This afternoon it was even leaking into the bus. The bus should be a safe spot, but it is not.

Google rocks

My day of being sick and miserable and rained on was made better by a free pen and spiral bound Google notebook. Also for attending the Google seminar this morning they promised to send all attendees a set of free google speakers that got held up at customs. Maybe it was worthwhile getting out of bed this morning.

Everybody has a price...

I'm always confused when I see cars driving along that have permanent stickers in the windows that say: "For Sale ph# 555-1234."

I know everything is available at some price, but permanently for sale? Will the person sell his phone number with the vehicle so who ever buys it can keep it for sale too?

Sticks suck.

I really hate getting to the end of a popsicle and tasting wood.

Funny sign

On the way home on the bus I was the only one who burst out laughing at a sign on the side of the road in front of a games store that said:

End of Summer Sale!
POO TABLES

in my pants... lately.

...something felt funny, and tickley, right on my left knee.

Upon investigation a ladybug was firmly marching up my leg but only got as far as my knee before I noticed something was not right in my jeans.

Making a fire.

This is what my dad needs to build a fire:

1. Wood, not neccessarily chopped. Preferrably 2x4's.
2. Blowtorch.
3. Air compressor.

Whoosh!

Matches, kindling, newspaper and axes are for sissies.

Vitamins

On our camping trip Anita brought along her vitamins... they were Centrum brand, which just begged for some teasing.

"Relying on the science of centrum?"
She laughed and said "no I rely on the science of whatever's on sale."

Probably a good idea. I bought some multi-vitamins this morning and am leaving them on my desk at work. Maybe I won't fall apart when I am old(er) if I start now.

A very stupid question indeed

I always try to avoid answering stupid questions that people ask of me because I cannot keep the incredulity of "what a stupid question" out of my voice.

The sad part of my job is that people think the internet is magic. It is pretty cool but it is not magic.

it just seems useless...

...to have old people at work.

If that seems age-ist, well, then too bad. It just seems useless to have these people occupying space and trying to figure out how "these new-fangled computers work" and getting in the way of me actually getting some work done.