Collaboration

Working on a document with a special user and I send him instructions with pictures and arrows, and speech bubbles that say things like "Click here!" "Press next!"

I get back only one complaint:

At the bottom of page 6 is 'view this list' and 'amd' (hopefully you see what I am talking about.) what is amd?

I respond:

Haha, AMD: Administrative Maintenance of Doughnuts... (take a break here)
Just kidding! I have no idea... just a blip I guess. Must have been typing too fast to make any sense.

The sounds of pain and suffering

A colleague has been getting phone calls during the work day from their kid who seems to have a defective phone. So it goes like this all day yesterday and today:

ringtone: "Happy Birthday Happy Birthday!"
"Hello?"
"Heeeeello?"
"Hellooooooo?"
"Hello? Whatever my kid's name is? Hello?"
"Hello!"
"Hello? Hello?"
"Hello."
"Hello!"
"Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?"
"Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
"I can't hear you."
"Hello?"
"Hello!"
"Hello!"
"Hello?"
And repeat.
Starting with "Happy Birthday".

Freudian Slip of the Fingers...

Following a series of rather unfortunate events through which both of my index fingers have been injured and rendered useless, I am stuck at the office typing with my two middle fingers. How fitting... *Eff you, work!*

Just picture it. You'll laugh too.

Disruptive

Someone is disturbing my train of thought on a beautiful Saturday afternoon by blasting Cher... there's only one solution! Blast some country to combat the caterwauling...

Yes, that's right, I like both kinds of music: country AND western!

The preponderance of good over evil-wordy-documents.

Burried in a wordy 60 page document I find this gem: "there are a preponderance of data management storage solutions"

To-do list:
look up "preponderance" so I can fake knowing what it means in the next meeting.

Stupendous compendiums

PS: Today my boss used the word compendium in a document. There was a compendium of presentations in a certain folder.
PL: Never use a shorter word when a longer one will make you look more like a wiener.